MENA Suvari was “addicted to METH as a child” and used drugs as a coping mechanism after her brother’s friend brutally raped her at age 12.
Mena, 42, has opened up about her “addiction to meth” in her new memoir The Great Peace, which details the horrifying experiences that led her to where she stands today.
The actress was brutally “raped by her brother’s friend” when she was just 12-years-old, which led her to dabble in substance abuse as a young teen.
“I never was all right again. It feels strange when I experience second-guessing myself when I would like to choose the word ‘rape,'” she wrote in the newly released book.
“Because I didn’t end up in the hospital. I didn’t end up unconscious. But isn’t just that I said no enough?”
‘NUMBING THE PAIN’
Mena began consuming a plethora of substances to hide from the pain, from alcohol to crystal meth, before developing an affliction towards the latter.
“I took drugs to numb myself from the pain. Alcohol. Pot. Coke. Crystal meth. Acid. Ecstasy. Mushrooms. Mescaline,” she confessed.
“It was my way of detaching from the hell of my existence – and surviving.”
During her time in high school, the Paradise Cove star allowed meth to “take over her life” as she was even using the substance during class breaks.
The drug “became my life, then it took over my life” she recalled, adding: “The hours I was at school were spent thinking about getting out of school and doing some lines.
“I stayed up until late at night, slept a couple hours, then repeated the day.
“Before long I was pulling out my small gold lacquered butterfly embossed compact mirror and snorting a line in the school bathroom during a break,” she remembered.
At age 17, Mena entered a relationship with a 26-year-old man she called the “devil himself,” and moved in with him shortly after.
Three years later she began filming American Beauty, but the verbal abuse had long since been underway.
“The whole time I worked on American Beauty, I was grinding on empty: working to perfect my part, submitting to [his] demands for kinky threesomes at least three or four times a week, and pretending in both cases that everything was okay,” the Rhode Island native penned.
“Except it wasn’t. … Little by little he whittled away the thin layer of self-worth I had left,” she claimed, confessing she even contracted an STD during one of his requested threesomes.
After finding a suicide note from her childhood, Mena “felt completely compelled to finally talk, I felt like I needed to just breathe and I was tired of fighting, running, playing, acting,” she explained to USA Today.
“It just felt better to me to live my life authentically.”
Though she admitted still feeling “uncomfortable” speaking on her past, Mena shared how the #MeToo movement helped her learn vulnerability.
“I spent so much time fighting myself, I spent so much time being hard on myself, living in that pain and regret.
“I worked with the spiritual teacher once and she called it sitting in your poopy diapers. I don’t want anyone to feel bad for me,” she reasoned.
“I just want to have conversations about it, like what can we do about it. Because I’ve sat in those moments, I’ve been in my poopy diapers for a long time.
“I don’t want to feel bad for myself anymore. I don’t want to give that power away.”
In April of 2021, Mena and her husband Michael Hope welcomed their first child together, a son named Christopher Alexander Hope.